Hear Fiona's full story as The Feed explores fertility this Thursday @ 8:30pm on SBS Viceland
I’d been over in the US for work and I had just come out of a long term relationship.
When I came back to Australia there was a feeling that a lot of my friends had moved on and started families.
I was 35 when I came back so I thought maybe I’ll meet someone, get engaged and get married quite quickly but I found dating in Sydney is sometimes tricky.
I thought I just need something to buy a little more time
Dating in the US is the opposite; it was so easy to meet guys. It was a bit of a shock coming home.
“You can’t be too confident”
In the end, my decision to freeze my eggs was a combination of getting a bit older and earning more money - it became a realistic option.
It wasn’t quite an insurance policy but what I didn't want was to meet someone when I’m 40 and then try IVF and it not to work.
The thought that I could've done something earlier to improve my odds… it was more a peace of mind proactive sort of thing.
I knew people who had kids in their 40s but I’ve also known people in their 20s who have struggled to have kids. You can't be too confident.
Before I made the final decision, all I’d heard of egg freezing was a couple of media stories - then I went to my fertility doctor, had my blood tested and he starting talking me through the statistics for older mothers.
I had to sign a form saying how long I wanted to keep them frozen for and you can decide how many years. It's sort of like a freezing fee that you get regularly. I said five years.
I thought by 42 I’d have to made a decision one way or another.
My doctor said the number that I had frozen was probably would give me a reasonable chance of having perhaps one baby.
This is because once the eggs are frozen, they have to be thawed and not all of them will survive. Then you have to make an embryo - there are all these variables.
It wasn't cheap but in the long run it felt reasonable for what I went through; the amount of medical visits and medication.
Back then [May 2017], I think, it was definitely less than $10,000.
Dating
Now that I’m going back and dating I feel the pressure is really off. It helps me when I’m meeting guys to meet the person rather than have all of this going on in the back of my head.
I won’t tell the person I’m dating straight away - I think there’s an appropriate time in a relationship when you feel like you’re ready to discuss a future together.
When I meet someone I’ll try and conceive naturally.
My fertility doctor said, “Give it a go for 6 months - if not go and see someone and see what options are the best approach”.
I had a break from dating but now I’m getting back on the apps and it’s going well.
Freezing my eggs just gave me more options.
The Feed explores fertility this Thursday @ 8:30pm on SBS Viceland
