Key Points
- Cecilie Fjellhøy was scammed of close to $350,000 by a man she knew as Simon Leviev
- She is still in the thick of her fight, and has made justice for other victims of fraud her life-long passion
See Cecilie Fjellhøy's first Australian interview in the 'Conned' episode of Insight, .
Norwegian-born Cecilie Fjellhøy, 34, is known globally for her role in Netflix’s The Tinder Swindler. More than 70 million people have watched her bare all about a relationship she believed was real.
In January 2018 Cecilie swiped right on a profile, met a man she came to know as Simon Leviev, fell in love, and the rest is history. Simon conned her out of nearly $350,000 and, four years later, Cecilie is still in debt.
Now based in London, Cecilie is still in the thick of her fight, and has made justice for herself and other victims of fraud her life-long passion.
When Insight decided to do an episode on people who have been conned - and those who con - Cecilie sprung to mind as an ideal guest. She agreed to be on the show, giving us her first Australian television interview.
Outside of the Insight studio, I was keen to know more about the woman who has become a familiar face in households around the world. We arranged to meet up for a coffee and a chat in the lobby of her hotel. A cappuccino for Cecilie. A decaf long black for me.
Cecilie Fjellhøy says fighting for victims of romance scams has become her 'lifelong passion.'
Coffee. Hands down. I’ve had some of the best coffee here.
You lived in Australia in 2011. What’s it like being back?
I love Australia. I remember when I was here I was so thankful for it because I was a student and I got the placement for free. So I thought, I’m on the other side of the world experiencing this, so many people would kill to be in my shoes. I just loved the friendliness and the people and of course the weather was amazing, coming from Norway in the winter when everything was freezing.
Australia is like this little hub where you feel at home here. I was living with an Aussie, in his childhood home with three German girls, and his Mum used to come - that was the first time I tasted Nando’s actually - because we didn’t have Nando’s in Norway. So she came every Sunday either with home-cooked food or brought Nando’s. And we were having Sunday dinner.
What was it like growing up in Norway? From the outside, we all are obsessed with Norwegian crime dramas and it's dark and the design is really cool.
Yeah, I think with how Norway is and also the climate as well, we have darkness and the cold.
You have to be quite strong as a person to actually keep going. And I was so shocked when I moved to London and they said, ‘Yep, when the cold comes I am going to go into hibernation, I’m not going to do anything.’
And I was like, ‘What?’. If we did that in Norway, just give up and not try because it’s so cold, you wouldn’t do anything for half the year. Half of your life you would have nothing to do. So I’m used to going out when it’s super dark.
When I was younger, you would be doing things, you had to push yourself, even though it’s dark and cloudy, maybe it’s pouring rain, maybe it’s slippery. You don’t want to go out but it’s that mentality of doing the best with what you have in a climate that is very unforgiving.
I was hosting 24-hour news when the shooting on Utoya Island happened in 2011. It has always stuck with me, it was such a big story here. You would have been in your early 20s and a lot of the kids on the island were 14, 15 years old. Do you remember that?
I was in Bali and on an island when I heard it had happened. I put on the news and I think, for me, I was so far away and the time difference. So I went to bed before it happened and the next morning, you know, when I woke up and it was like, 77 people dead, I just felt it completely.
I was so far away from home and we were just crying. I was inside my hotel room and I think it was a bit of a shock. I didn’t really realise what had happened, it just seemed surreal and it was only after a few days that they found where the bodies were and they could piece together how people had to run. It was so horrific.
What I am most sad about is that he (gunman Anders Breivik) went to the biggest political youth party in Norway. And he actually managed to kill a lot of their future. Because they were supposed to go into politics.
Oh, right. So they would be in their late 20s now, and would have been the future politicians of Norway.
There were two or three that were very well known that were speakers, they were killed.
Cecilie says she hung a poster of the Tinder Swindler show in her room, as a reminder of the importance of speaking up.
That's what he wanted, to kill the future of that party. That party has never recovered. That's what he wanted and I hate that he managed to do it.
I feel like the women in Norway are really strong and seem to hold an equal place in society. Would that be fair to say?
We're so 50/50. When I moved to London it was a completely different dating scene, for example. In Norway, which I'm happy about, men and women are supposed to be equal and know when it comes to dating and stuff like payment on the first date, it’s 50/50.
But it has shifted a bit with my mindset as the years pass, it has been very interesting when it comes to women and men being equal. It's a bit of a touchy subject when it’s coming from me but history shows women still do more of the emotional labour.
We will have more problems with kids. A lot of women, when they retire they have nothing. It comes back to what we've experienced with the documentary and the tale of women going after the men with money.
What is going on for men who go after young pretty women? No-one is saying, ‘How horrible of you to want a young beautiful woman.’ That’s totally OK for a man. But if you say, ‘I want a man who is ambitious and has money’ - it’s just that you don’t need to worry about money.
If you have kids in London, if you would make the same money as I do in IT, you could never have kids in kindergarten and go to work. It's too expensive, it's almost like my whole pay.
So that's why we're more equal in Norway because it's actually possible. So I have been reflecting a lot about why we’re being judged so much. I come from a very equal society, I never thought that when I met this guy I was going to be hounded for being a gold-digger and going after a man with money.
A selfie of Cecilie and the man she thought was Simon Leviev, also know as Shimon Hayut.
I have the poster of The Tinder Swindler in my room. I hung it up here. Someone said, ‘What is it like to wake up and look at that?’. And I was like, that's something I'm incredibly proud of. It’s something I worked on. It’s not something that just came into my lap. It has taken blood, sweat and tears, you know?
I don’t want to be known as being from The Tinder Swindler, but the part of being a spokesperson for fraud and debt issues I will never have an issue with because it’s something that will always be very dear to my heart.
To be looked upon as a person who spoke up, even though you knew you would be getting a lot of backlash because of how you were defrauded. It takes a lot to bare your soul, and how you’re actually doing, to such a large audience all the time.
Do people recognise you and reach out to you?
What I've seen is such a need for help as I say, like, every time now, when people reach out to me, they say, ‘How can I get my story out there? What should I do?’
There's a lot of people that want me to help in terms of press. It's not about getting known. It's about warning and making people aware of this person. It’s such a shame that people now have to resort to the media. That really is the only vehicle now by which people can be heard.
Cecilie is still in debt, four years after her run-in with Simon Leviev.
I can't respond because it’s too much because I'm still dealing with my thing. I can’t wait until I’m done so I can actually fully heal. But it’s too much for one person to bear because they are people who are in trauma.
What do people ask you the most?
The red flags. I’ve been asked about it so many times. It's a very good question. I don’t think, ‘Here we go again’. But it does put the responsibility on the victim. It's like, ‘Oh, you didn't see them?’
Well, I laugh when people ask because yeah, I didn't see them. You know, that's why I got defrauded. The signs are there but I didn’t see them. If I saw them, I would still have my money.
Before you get into the brain-washing, that's when we need to have discussions about fraud so people know about it. Because when you’re deep in it and they got you, there’s so much they can do to you and you won’t see the red flags.
So I understand the question but I'm always trying to change the narrative. We need to talk more about the criminals and why they're doing what they're doing, and why the systems are built almost around them. It is so easy for them to get your money.
Cecilie works as a UX designer in IT, and says she wants to use her skills to help fraud victims get the information they need.
I really want my organisation, the foundation, to flourish, but I'm thinking I could make it more of a business as well. Because I see a huge need (working with) bank investigators, that banks need to be very educated and trained in how to talk to fraud victims, how to do proper investigations.
How do you make the phone call, if you think someone's been defrauded? Or experienced identity theft? So I would love - I work as a UX Designer - to make it better and maybe create case studies for them, maybe online courses, maybe workshops in person. And I also really want to change laws, change legislation.
So this is like a big picture thing for you. Have you ever thought if you didn’t swipe right on him, what your five-year thing would be?
I have other things I'm passionate about, as well, more normal things. Like we don't have any blow dry bars. There are several smaller things I was thinking about starting before all of this.
And I've always loved public speaking, even before as a UX Designer I was holding different types of talks. So that's something I'm really passionate about.
I feel like we have a need here. We have fraud victims who need peer support or help, and then we have bank investigators that feel like they don't know what to say to someone. As a UX Designer I need to take them through the process.
You need a livable wage, you can't do this from the goodness of your heart. You need to find a way to get money in from it, I have a charity but I still need a paycheque.
OK maybe a few fun things. Are you an introvert or extrovert?
I'm an introvert-extrovert. I am super extroverted when it comes to, you know, meeting new people and much more. But I can be by myself for an entire day. When I went to Cannes and Monaco and did two talks in London, I needed a day where I didn’t speak.
What about comfort food?
Oh, Indian food. I love Indian food. In London I do takeout where I have raita and naan bread and everything.
If you had a magic power, like you can fly, you can go invisible, you can travel back in time, you can teleport - what would you wish for?
I think I would have made the world just. Maybe if not, I would have teleported. The lovely idea of travelling without feeling like this! No jetlag maybe.
But if I could be anything I would have special powers over the feeling that if you just have the money and the power this wouldn't have been an issue. It cuts deep, you know? It cuts really deep sometimes.
I don't think I would have needed to do all this as much if he was in jail and I was done with the injustice of it all. I'm still struggling with debt. My justice is much higher because it has such a large impact on me. If you have a rich family they can bail you out.
