Amanpreet (name changed) had a lavish and a big fat Indian wedding. Her seven-day long wedding celebrations according to Sikh Traditions has a henna function, sangeet function and revelries going on for days to celebrate her communion with an Indian-origin man from Australia who had boasted of his Permanent Visa status before her parents.
Amanpreet’s family spent over a $100,000 on wedding and lavish gifts for the groom and her family. This included a 22-carat gold jewellery, car and furniture for the groom’s family in India but it clearly wasn’t enough for the groom and his family.
The mental torture, abusive and sarcastic comments soon began.
She dreamt of a happy life with him but her dreams of a happy married life were shattered when her husband started abusing her, hitting her. Her three years of marriage was a long nightmare as she faced violent attacks from her husband when his demands for more money weren’t met.
Amanpreet currently separated from her husband, lives in a safehouse in Melbourne.
Help has finally arrived for the victims of Dowry Abuse in Victoria. The Royal Commission into Family Violence has recommended that within 12 months the Victorian Government should include dowry-related abuse within the ambit of family violence. Victorian Government has agreed to implement all recommendations of the 1900-page report.
Manjula O’Connor, Director of the Australasian Centre for Human Rights and Health, who has campaigned for this cause since November 2012 said, ‘this is a landmark development as this law in Australia will have an impact on India. Parents in India will know that dowry has been outlawed in Australia.”
O’connor’s Centre has dealt with over a thousand cases of domestic violence in last few years. “And I can say that 50% of the domestic violence cases that I have come across in last 12 months are related to dowry,” she asserts.
Dr Manjula O'Connor, Anti-dowry Campaigner Source: White Ribbon Australia
She points out that women in distress who have been victims of domestic violence and have sought her help, have mostly approached her when the issue reaches a head and they have no place to go. In last 12 months, third of the women who have come to her have been suicidal. One of those 6 women have attempted suicide and so far there have been 2 dowry-related deaths in Victoria.
She points out to the murder of Shikha Godara, who was murdered by her husband in December 2014. Her husband, Sunil Beniwal, left their 4-year-old crying by his mother’s dead body, before he rammed his car into a truck, killing himself.
Source: Mosiqi Acharya
“Shikha’s father later told me that it was a dowry-related murder,” O’Connor says.
O’Connor who is a psychiatrist herself says that these recommendations will give a clarity to all the authorities and the stakeholders on how to deal with dowry-related domestic violence.
Amanpreet and Shikha are two examples of how dowry-related violence is a reality in Australia today.
“Often these victims who come as brides to Australia from India are cheated by their husbands and in-laws. Their education, their social-status, their employment details are either false or exaggerated. One victim told me that her husband claimed to her that he was a businessman, when infact he was driving a taxi here. Another victim shared how her husband had lied to her about his educational qualifications. She herself was an IT Engineer from a reputable institution in India and was disappointed that her husband was nothing what he claimed,” O’Connor says.
She also told SBS Hindi how many Indian grooms in the community had exaggerated their social status, their income in Australia as a bargaining tool to extract money from the girl’s family. “One mother-in-law told the girl that her son is a Citizen of Australia so he can get anything he wants and how little she had brought for the family.”
Have you been a victim of dowry-related harassment, torture or violence? Are you being pressurised to provide dowry? Please write to us at to share it.
For help or information regarding domestic violence, call the Sexual Assault, Domestic Family Violence Counselling Service on 1800 737 732, or visit
